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7-29

Mon, 30 Jul 2012 03:27:28 -0400

So laaast weekend J and I went to bar trivia with some friends and he made a point to walk me to my car. It was raining so we ran, but ended up making out in the rain… D’awww. He hung out with me the night before “Pioneer Day”, too… He stayed the night and, well- you know…

We hung out Wednesday, too. Thursday I missed Twilight, but went out Friday. Saturday we went to a BBQ at S’s house. I get some interesting jealous vibes from him… Went to Cruzrs after and got pretty tanked. J drove me back to his house and I passed out. Today he and I did some shopping and had some lazy time before hitting trivia. The gays came, and so did S and company- it was a good time, actually. Everyone kept asking if we were a couple, so I let J answer and he kept saying “yeah pretty much”. We had a talk earlier in the day about how I need time bc i don’t want to hurt him, and he said he could be patient… Somehow by the end of the night he started calling me his girlfriend..

Current mood: terrified.

7-22

Sun, 22 Jul 2012 15:39:35 -0400

Went to Twilight concert to see NAS and Tinie Tempah on Thursday 7/18 with J and met up with Jelly and his roommate. Got super drunk and walked home with J, during which he held my hand and even offered to carry me… Hah. He also kissed me for the first time. Went to an after party at Jelly’s friend’s place. Took J home, picked up up Jelly and his friend to crash at my place. Decided to take a shower and when I came out? Lo and behold, the roommate had left and Jelly was in my bed. Classic. Sooo I told him to move.. :)

We ended up sharing the bed but nothing happened- other than him asking to kiss me “you know, as a friend”, nuzzling my arm, and proceeding to comment on how much he thinks J likes me but that he’s “lame”… Jealousy?

Friday night J took me to Dark Knight Rises with a bunch of his friends and bought my ticket/food/etc. We held hands and snuggled in the theater. Sooo high school! But cute. He’s not a super great kisser from what I can tell- and he’s kind of a sci fi/rpg nerd, by I don’t yet know how deep it runs…

Last night I started talking to a few new people. The main one we’ll call Drew. 20, 5’11, Sagittarius. He’s cute, funny, gets my humor, has tattoos and gauges- buuut he just got out of a relationship. Not sure how long ago, but sounds recent. He was born in Fountain Valley, CA though- so next door to HB :)

7-16

Tue, 17 Jul 2012 01:37:12 -0400

Aaron is doing well and is supposed to be getting a new place this week so I’m sure I won’t see much of him.

Josh and I have maintained contact- not too much, but enough to affirm we’re on each other’s minds.

I have not spoken to Tom since Saturday, which is only two days- but that’s not normal for “us”. I believe my wall has been built… :/

Jared’s been avoiding me it seems, but then is always on my facebook liking my posts etc… Says he’s busy- benefit of the doubt I suppose.

Met up with S’s friends on Saturday, only to run into him and his girlfriend… Hah. He saw me, dropped her hand-which he was holding- and acted way awkward. Haven’t seen him in forever so I remained unaffected but he never bothered to introduce the girl to me- although I know I’ve met her somewhere before. His friends J and T were totally talking shit on the whole situation and kept asking what I saw in him hahah. J and I have hit it off and hung out again last night for trivia. He also invited me out again next weekend… He’s 6’1, 23, and a Cancer. He’s not entirely my “type”- but we get along super well. He has the same birthday as my little Levi :))

Lastly, met a new kid from CA. We’ll call him Jelly haha. He’s 20, 6’2 and a Scorpio. He kinda looks like Skrillex, with a cuter face- he’s quirky but we spent about 4 hours just talking and driving around until I realized I had to meet up with J. Hoping we don’t run out of things to say cuz he’s pretty rad.

July 11th

Wed, 11 Jul 2012 20:30:20 -0400

So today’s my last full day in CA, and seeing as I’m spending it sitting watching “Wife Swap”… I figured my time might be better utilized updating here ;)

I’ve maintained contact with Tom since I’ve been here, but our “conversations” via text yesterday consisted only of him talking about his burned hand. Apparently he went to Starbucks a couple of days ago and the lid wasn’t secure on his cup so the coffee spilled and burned his hand. Maybe I’m jaded because I’ve spent the last 7 years in and out of coffee shop jobs- but it’s kind of only list of “shit happens”. He, evidently, has filed a report with Starbucks “Incident Management Department” and feels that he is owed free coffee for a year, as it’s “the least they could do”. My initial reaction was to antagonize him, but I’ve chosen instead to ignore it… And distance myself.

In other news, someone I saw briefly in CA before I moved back to Utah last fall (Josh, Libra, 21, 6’0) got ahold of me about a week before I came down here- not knowing I was even taking the trip. So we met up and kind of rekindled that spark, if you will. We talked more about relationships, and opened up more about ourselves. I think we’re in a similar place in life, and if nothing else it was nice to reestablish that connection.

Lastly- Aaron is staying at my place while I’m down here. Long story short, he was in jail because he chased an intruder out of his house and the dumbass ran into the street and got hit by the cop car that was pulling up in response to his call… Suuuper effed up situation, and he was in for about 9 weeks. I’m sure I’ll talk to him about it more when he picks me up from the airport ;)

7-3

Wed, 04 Jul 2012 01:19:05 -0400

So it’s been two weeks since my last post… Where to start?

Mostly I’ve been preoccupied with work. I’ve been making time to hang out with Tom more, though lately I’ve felt like there are some mixed signals. I spent this last weekend with him since I leave for AZ/CA on the 5th, and met his parents, siblings and nephew on Sunday. I tend to be kind of quiet so hopefully they didn’t find me too awkward haha.

The only thing that’s bugging me- call me a woman- is that I don’t have plans for the 4th, which he knows… yet he hasn’t invited me to join his family get together… Buuut I’m not going to lose sleep over it.

It’s weird- I like him, and he gives me space, and I think about him everyday… But I feel a certain distance, like we’re keeping an arms length between us. And maybe I’m not the only one who’s not entirely ready…

In the meantime, I never met that cancer, and I decided to stop talking to closet case. As for the threesome- they’re out of town, and now I’m leaving. Part of me feels guilty for even having it in the back of my mind though… :/

Haven’t slept with anyone else since Tom and I… “started”. But on that note I’ve been having some symptoms of an infection so I’m a little worried. I go for my yearly next Monday in CA though so I’m just trying to let go. I always psyche myself out for nothing heh

6-20

Thu, 21 Jun 2012 03:00:28 -0400

I’ve been super busy with work, so not much has happened. I’m getting a promotion though :D

I went up to see Tom and spent the night on Sunday. I was raggin, so I was being moody, but he was very patient with me. I let him in a bit more and told him I was worried about sleeping with him because I tend to detach myself after… Monday morning he made me breakfast in bed (a total first) and we just stayed cuddled up for a long time. After that one thing kind of led to another, aaand we had sex for the first time… It was great, but I’m having mixed emotions. Granted I have a lot going on right now, but I keep psyching myself out… Hoping it’s a phase. We spent all day Monday shopping and misc, but he said he had fun just being with me :*) He’s supposed to be coming down on Friday to go to the Arts Festival, too- and I’m excited to see him :)

I talked to Kimo earlier this week and we’re supposed to go see the new Wes Andersen movie tomorrow.

There’s also a new guy (Joe, 23, 5’11, Cancer) that I’m supposed to have coffee with or something tomorrow night.

I also started talking to “Kevin” (24, Libra, 5’6), who is apparently a virgin. And Mormon. We talked about sex almost exclusively after a really deep convo about life and interest and goals… So bizarre. Also, possible closet homo.

I’ve also been keeping tabs on our fake profile… It just gets better and better- or worse and worse…? Haha

Laaastly- I had a Capricorn guy and Scorpio girl proposition me for a threesome. We all have busy schedules, so I think it’ll be a process… But I met them last week and they’re both super cute and maybe even a little naive. I mentioned it to Jared and he threw his name in the ring, so I’m may counter propose… We’ll see.

Basically at this point I’m taking my time, and keeping my options open. I’ve got so much going on that I just don’t feel like I can focus too much on these misc dating details. All I know is I’m single, and for the most part- happy :)

Hey Juuune

Thu, 21 Jun 2012 02:42:36 -0400

Haven’t seen Kimo in a while- we’ve both been busy and neither of us is making much of an effort…

Sean is such a loose canon… I saw him Friday night at the club, and at the end of the night he walked me to my car and kissed me goodnight. Then he made me promise we’d hang out either yesterday or today because he “had no plans”. Then he avoided hanging out and is now with whoever else making fliers for a show. I’m noticing a pattern.

Jared is weird, too, although we’re still sleeping together. He’s got a lot going on, so I understand. And I don’t feel attached but I do care about him. That’s about it there…

Tom and I went on two more dates- once I went up to his place and we went for Italian. The next he came down here and we did a brew pub and saw Dark Shadows- which I loved :) I really like that he opens the car door for me, and makes an effort to correspond. He’s really very sweet that way. I’ve been to his house, and met his cat. He spent this weekend with his family but we talk every day. It’s almost too good. I think part of me is trying to convince myself it won’t work but so many signs are positive. Today he corrected himself to use a “we” statement, which I jokingly called him out on- hopefully he got the humor as usual. Hate to think I’d come off too jaded- which I’ve definitely been accused of before…

6-9-12

Sat, 09 Jun 2012 11:19:09 -0400

Went up to see Tom on Tuesday night and made spicy tofu with rice noodles together. Met his best friend Mikey and stayed til about 11 just snuggled up on the couch. I’m starting to feel really at ease with him :)

In other news, my friend Joel came and hung out Monday night and got the bright idea to create a fake profile with some internet skank’s photos… In the first 24 hours over 140 guys tried messaging “her”. We’re well over 200 now and it just blows my mind how crazy/creepy/disgusting some of these people are…

I really do need to get better about posting...

Sat, 19 May 2012 19:21:31 -0400

Where were we? Ah yes-
So I’ve continued hanging out with Sean though we don’t see each other much. I get the impression that he’s very indecisive BUT I’m okay with that to some degree because I am, too. He’s sick currently so not sure when I’ll see him next.

Last night I went on my first “real” date in a while. His name is Tom, he’s 32, an Aquarius, and 5’8 (same as me). He has tattoos and a sort of hipster vibe, but he also has a house, a car, and a job as an Orthopedic Assistant. We’re into the same movies, literature and even music too to some degree. We also have a very similar sense if humor which is super important to me. It’s still very early but there’s something about his energy that I really like… So we’ll see what happens :)

Catch-up

Mon, 07 May 2012 11:35:05 -0400

Went to a bar with Kimo last Wednesday night to shoot pool and have a beer. He informed me that he ha the weekend off but I worked every day so there wasn’t much I could do to take advantage of that :/ I still find him to be quite nice, if a bit awkward- but I’m still giving him a chance.

Friday night I went thrifting with Sean and his friend. The lesbian from work was having a party so I invited them along. Jared ended up getting ahold of me, too so I picked him up on the way.

Sooo if you put two and two together… I had one of the guys I’m dating, the guy I’m sleeping with, and the girl who wants me- in the same room at the same time… As it were, the lesbian and Jared went to junior high together… Small world. It actually turned out to be a good night. Sean and his friend left, then Jared and I snuck out to go back to my place :)

Last night (5/6) I went on a coffee date after work with a new guy (Rob, 22, Capricorn). He’s kind of gamer awkward but has a silly sense of humor so he might make a good acquaintance :)

9 days later...

Mon, 30 Apr 2012 01:38:39 -0400

Okay, where to start…

Well last Sunday the Rabbit was found in the wee hours, so technically Monday morning. Called my Lez from work and drove out to BFE to pick it up. By appearances it looks fine, but I had it towed to VW to have it checked out and re-keyed. The cops dusted for prints and collected some evidence so we’ll see what happens.

Monday night I went grocery shopping after work and some kid came up and asked if I’d be “offended” If he hit on
me… Which was kind of super awkward. So we get to talking and he mentions he’s on probation and staying with his mom and doesn’t have a job and then asks where I live and if I live alone and where I work- so I tell him a store name (there are 6 possible locations in this area) and he guesses the one I work at… So I head to the checkout and he asks if he can come home with me so I say no. Then he asks again so I say no. Then he offers to help with my groceries, so I decline. I finish paying and notice he’s gone so I ask the cashier if someone can walk me out. I load my groceries and I’m leaving the parking lot when I realize a truck is following me. I took a different route and thankfully made it through a yellow light that left them behind. I proceeded to freak out and call my dad, then ended up calling Jason. He was in my area so I picked him up and he stayed the night- so that made me feel a lot better.

In the actual/online ;) dating world… I hung out with Kimo and went disc golfing on- Tuesday I think it was? We showed up wearing the same colors in our outfits- which HE later pointed out :) hah. We went for tea again and talked and listened to music until I had to be at work. He’s very nice… And I’m learning to appreciate it more :)

Jared’s grandma passed away so he was kind of touch and go. He spent the night Wednesday though. We get along really well, too. And of course the attraction is there, but I’m still drawing that line. He randomly gave me some tar blockers for my cigarettes- said he knew I liked to stay healthy… It was a cute gesture :)

Other than that I kept a pretty low profile for the week.

Friday was lasertag with Sean and company but I had work all day yesterday so I passed. Last night I met up with him and some of his other friends for fetish night at a local club. The theme was anime (gag) but it was a good time. We danced and had a few drinks, and I made some new friends. Got my 4th parking ticket in two weeks as I was leaving but other than that… Totally worth it ;)

Talked with Sean on the phone tonight and made plans for later this week, waiting on Kimo to make some plans, too. Started talking to a few new people but no one worth mentioning quite yet :)

4-20

Fri, 20 Apr 2012 23:21:01 -0400

So I went to the Grand Kerfuffle last night with Jared. It was a lot of fun. He was semi protective of me when a fight broke out, and didn’t let me get sucked in- so that was cute. I can’t see dating him though. Like there’s this crazy sexual energy between us but he’s everything I’ve worked to get away from so I feel like I have to watch myself…

Sky (20, 6’2, Cancer) and his friend came by last Sunday (stolen car day hah) and I forgot to mention we kissed but I haven’t heard from him since.

Two days ago I switched back to “seeking men” on the site. Today I met up with a new guy named Kimo (26, 6’4, Cancer)… Me and Cancers lately… Yeesh hah :) He was kind of super awkward but a total sweetheart so I hope I get to see him again. And he has the same birthday as my best friend :D We got coffee errr tea hah and then went on a walk to the park and sat and talked for a few hours.

After that I met up with my lezzie from work and she bought me lunch and then we went and explored the new mall. I dunno what’s going on between us but I’m super cautious because A. We work together and B. She has a girlfriend…

We parted ways and I did some errands and then Jared called wanting to hang out but then texted back 5 minutes later and said he was going to stay home… Guys are super weird- I’m just going to chalk it up to him probably being stoned… 4/20, right? Haha

The saga continues...

Wed, 18 Apr 2012 22:46:54 -0400

So I picked up my car (2012 Mazda3) Sunday and went to work. My friends from Idaho were in town for a show so I ran home to change and as I came around the corner I realized my other car (2007 VW Rabbit) was gone… So I called the cops and reported it stolen. My key was in my purse and you can’t steal a newer VW without a key sooo… Those creeps totally know where I live… AND work. Can’t say I’m stoked.

Anyway, on the dating front- Jared and I are going to a concert together, Sean and I are hanging out again this weekend… And one of the little lesbians at my new job TOTES has a crush on me :))

3-15

Sun, 15 Apr 2012 11:44:17 -0400

Picked up Jared Friday night and went to hang out with Dustin and his gay Nate. Drank some champagne and let him come home with me. Now I AIN’T sayin I’m smitten- but we got down pretty much all night… And it was probably the best I’ve ever had. Just sayin-

Oddly enough, just as we were getting to it, Mitch called from a new phone number that I didn’t recognize… So that was awkward. Then he called me after my car got broken into last night and when I told him what happened he asked for a ride… Have I mentioned I’m over it? Jeezus-

In other news, I did hang out with Sean and Co last night, which was great until someone busted out my window and stole my bag… :/ He and his friends (more so) were super supportive though. And he gave me a ride home. Now I’m just waiting on him to pick me up so I can go get my car. Finger’s crossed nothing else happened to it overnight…

Friday the 13th...

Fri, 13 Apr 2012 17:52:52 -0400

Favorite day! hah :)

A. Never have I been so stoked to start my period… Womp wooomp ;p

and

B. I’m hanging out with Jared after work :)

4-12-12

Fri, 13 Apr 2012 00:25:36 -0400

Fiiinally met Jared (19, Cancer). Picked him up and went to City Creek. He’s a lot of fun- and suuuper cute :) He’s just shy of 6’, has 1 1/4”ish gauges, snakebites, good sense of style, similar taste in music… He’s Hispanic but has these crazy gorgeous green eyes… Aaaanyway- we got along super well and he pretty much had me laughing the whole time. It was nice :)

This last Sunday I went to Hunger Games with Sean but he wasn’t feeling well. And Saturday we went to his friend’s birthday party but I had to be up early so I bailed before much happened… He ‘s still running hot and cold so I’m taking a step back. I did however bring up kickboxing and he offered to teach me so we’re supposed to start this weekend… Guess we’ll see… :)

4-5-12

Thu, 05 Apr 2012 23:21:15 -0400

So I went out of town for a couple of days… Not much new stuff on the dating front buuut I did change my profile to meet some girls. We’ll see what happens :)

That awkward moment when

Sat, 31 Mar 2012 05:18:55 -0400

you’re out with your current flame and run into the server you gave your number to two weeks ago at the bar… Yuuup…

Played it off like a champ though ;D

Had a shit day then an awesome night with Sean and his buddy. Even saw him drunk for the first time! Did the Soul Food thing, got invited to shenans tomorrow (3/31)… And made out for the first time.. Eeep! Granted he was drunk but eh- I’ll take it ;)

Honesty is the best policy...

Mon, 26 Mar 2012 12:08:41 -0400

Sean took his time coming over but he did follow through on his promise to make me dinner- which was absolutely delicious. We talked music a bit more and I told him about this blog… He seems okay with it and even asked if he could be in it… Little does he know ;p

In other honesty- (see what I did there) Jason didn’t end up coming over, but my other (totally platonic) friend did because he needed a place to crash on his way home from out of state… I showed him around downtown a bit and then we came back to my place and talked and started a movie. I made a goofy noise that spurred a wrestling match that ended with him on top of me… And our clothes off. Hmmm…

3-25-12

Sun, 25 Mar 2012 17:06:13 -0400

Went to Holi with Sean and his friend and one of my gays. It was an absolute blast. Met up with Sean and some of his other friends later for drinks. I let slip about this blog to one of his female friends, excluding the link- so I’m going to see if it comes back to me… We were supposed to go to a movie around noon today (it’s now 3) and then he was going to come over and cook dinner. I’ve yet to hear from him though.

In other news, I had Jason clean all the powder and crap out of my car from the festival and as I was leaving it hit me that he might have feelings for me. I don’t want to read into it too much but he’s supposed to come over later tonight so we’ll see what happens?